If only.
Today I was due to go the gym but had no time.
I can't remember when I last had a chocolote chip muffin although I'm pretty sure that the chips would have been Belgian chocolate.
Coffee now gives me migraines so that assumption was wrong as well.
But I did get up late and my lunch was leisurely.
Most of the day, however, was spent job hunting and phoning agencies. Today I applied for four jobs.
Correction
Yesterday I reported that the properties section of my c.v. (which displays when you put the cursor over a Windows folder) showed a creation date back in the last millenium. That's been corrected.
After that correction I carried on with my evolutionary approach to sending c.v.s. Each job gets a tailored c.v. based on the one I sent before it. I have a "career d.n.a." document full of key phrases used to describe my skills. I pick the appropriate ones and paste them into the first page of my c.v. It works. People do like my c.v. even if they don't want to interview me.
Whilst creating the c.v. for the second or third job application today I suddenly noticed an error. I had used "and" instead of "have". This could only mean that I had sent out this error in my last application.
Oh, coitus.
I don't know how it had crept in. Looking at the same sets of text day-in day-out leads to this. I even sometimes read out my c.v. and covering letters aloud to see if that can trap errors. Sometimes it does but not always.
Worked closely
I tend to use the phrase "worked closely" quite a lot in my c.v.s unless I trap them: "worked closely with internal and external stakeholders", " worked closely with suppliers ..." it's true but repetitive. I do tend to trap the repeats but my fingers will automatically type out these two words whenever they're given the chance.
I can think of better words to type out, e.g. "blondes", "breasts", "chocolate chip muffins" but my fingers are fixed on "worked closely".
Collective amnesia
After applying to the four vacancies I called nearly every recruiter who, in the last two months, had called and said they would consider me for a role they were handling.
Most had the same line. The job had gone, mainly filled by someone already working for the recruiting company, they apologised but I should have received an email to this effect. I hadn't.
It was still good to call them. It gave me the opportunity to discover if they had anything else suitable.
One agency thought they did have a suitable role. They actually called back 10 minutes later to tell me that actually the client wouldn't like my background in a mix of companies. Knowing the client I'm not surprised.
I think it is important to pursue agents just about every time. I know I occassionally lose heart and don't do this but most of the time I do.
Years ago I went for an interview with Enron. They kept me waiting at least half an hour without telling me what was going on. Just as I was about to walk out the recruiting manager turned up. Half way through the interview we were kicked out of the meeting room as someone else had booked it. We finished the interview on the seats at their reception.
Disgusted I went home and told the recruitment agent I didn't wan't to go any further with them. Boy, was I smug when they collapsed.
Anyway, at least a year later I saw an advert, from the same agent, for an up and coming energy company. I sent him my c.v. but heard nothing.
A few days later I saw the job advertised again. I phoned him. "Oh hello John," he said, "I thought of you but your salary requirements would be too high". The agent had somehow confused my requirements. I told him that the salary his client was offering was very acceptable and more than what I was earning at the time. Put right, he arranged an interview and bingo, I got the job.
So, it pays to phone.
Incidentally, the company went from growth to decline in less than a year. I was made redundant and the company eventually closed.
Also, the recruitment agent went off to Australia.
Amongst my phone calls today was one to the agent handling the company with whom I had an interview two weeks ago. Turns out the manager at the company is off sick.
I'm cool about this but my only concern is that they have a critical deadline which the person they're recruiting must meet. Every day delayed in recruiting that person (i.e. maybe me) is a day lost in meeting that deadline.
"Clock's ticking Clarice. Tick, tock, tick tock"
The strange case of the Support Manager and the Project Manager
My mangement career has been based on leading IT support teams. As a result of this I have had to deliver quite a few projects. Some of these projects were "vital to companies' on-going success" as I like to put on my c.v. Which is an understatement. Especially in one case where if I hadn't delivered the project on time the company would have failed a year earlier than it actually did.
This experience now means that I can market myself as both a support manager and an infrastructure project manager. Not least because I'm a PRINCE2 practitioner and APM Professional (those who know what this means can get off their knees now).
So a few days ago I sent my c.v. to an agent who was recruiting project managers. I phoned her today.
She didn't sound keen on my background as it's clear that my project management experience is a result of my team management experience. She had received c.v.s from people who've done nothing but project management for five years.
That's fine with me but she then asked if I could change the title of my last permanent role on my c.v., from "IT Support Services Manager" to something with the words "project manager" added. I refused. It wouldn't be true.
I even suggested she put my details in a secondary queue in case more promising candidates were all rejected. But she said she'd be happy to send my c.v. as it was. Crickey.
We talked about locations and she said that her client was based all over the UK and so I'd work out of their nearest office. "Please don't" I almost shouted and explained that this is the only place where I'm not looking to work. Well here and downtown Baghdad.
Another advert
This leads me on nicely to what's becoming a regular feature: advert of the day.
"High-level consultancy company requires an experienced Project Manager to run a number of multiple telecom and networking projects for operator. Must be PMI, or Prince 2 Certified with a proven track record in managing projects for the telco sector. Must be an Arab - Arabic speaking does not count. An excellent opportunity for those that know." Only location given is Middle East.
I'm not sure this is even legal. You couldn't put the ethnic requirement for a role in Britain (with certain very clear exceptions).
In the recent past I've seen adverts for roles in that region which come with "close protection" (i.e.bodyguard) or "compound accommodations".
I actually know (knew) enough Arabic to order beer. Not, perhaps, the most useful skill in that langauage.
Domain name
Currently my home page has a name which is a sub-domain off my ISP. It's rather an inelegant DNS. I use the home page to host my professional details, c.v. (oh so very useful as I found once again today) and links to other writings and this blog.
I'm thinking of registering a domain name in my own right. Not sure what to call it though.
Most people find it impossible to spell my surname. So, I use the initials JKC a lot.
jkc.com has been taken, as has jkc.net etc. I was thinking jkc.eu.com, maybe. The important thing is that it sounds professional. bigbadsiteof jkc.com just won't do.
Any ideas?
Guidelines
In this blog I've written a few guidelines for job hunting. I've also received advice from people who have posted comments.
But thinking about it, recruiters, especially interviewers, desperately need advice as well.
Here's a few:
- Don't display your cleavage when interviewing me (this happened to me last year). I've come to find out about the job, not where I could park my bike. If you're a gorgeous young woman I won't be able to get out of my seat at the end of the interview. If you're a 50 year old woman who looks like boiling water has been spilt down your front (as happened last year) I might be sick. Remember, I don't wear a codpiece to interviews so you don't have to wear a low-cut top.
- Don't interview me when drunk.
- Don't ask me if I need the job because I've got a girl pregnant or because I'm running up gambling debts.
- Do offer me tea or coffee or water.
- Do interview me on-time or at least send an explanation if there's an unavoidable delay. If I can overcome UK transport to arrive on time, you can sort out any mainframe explosions or whatever and still interview me promptly.
- Don't say your dog has the same name as my surname (which isn't Rover or anything dogg-ish).
- Do ensure I get feedback within, oh, six months. Especially when it's cost me hundreds of pounds to fly over and you work for a multi-billion dollar company.
- Do tell me from the outset if the end part of the recruitment process is something daft like handwriting analysis. I'm developing a herbal remedy for gullability but meantime let me know if you're a kooky company and we can stop wasting each other's time.
I'll update this list another time. Feel free to add suggestions (but it's my list remember).
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